


I Know

by randommindtime



Category: Stargate Atlantis
Genre: Comfort, Emotions, Fanart + Fanfic, M/M, Miller's Crossing Missing Scene
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-28
Updated: 2016-11-28
Packaged: 2018-09-02 18:12:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 382
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8677825
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/randommindtime/pseuds/randommindtime
Summary: A missing scene from Miller's Crossing.  I drew and wrote this when I was first coming back into McShep this past summer and never posted it on AO3, so I thought it was about time!





	

Of all the places to be having such a moment, a bland, faceless office 22-stories underground with harsh fluorescent lighting wasn’t the most advantageous. Though, Rodney supposed that the stale walls of the SGC weren’t much different than hospital rooms and people broke down in those over the dead and the dying every day.

“…I’m sorry…”

The voice next to his ear was gruff and quiet, muffled into the hood of his sweater. John’s arms were wrapped tight around his body, hands gripping fabric with determination. Rodney understood - he was doing the same. He was still there despite having decided already that he should be dead.

“…I’ll - I’ll find another way, I just…I can’t…”

Rodney wanted to be mad, wanted desperately to yell and defy and berate John’s idiotic idea that he was worth more than this sacrifice. Instead, he let John lean into him, feeling his weight and his heat, and breathed in deep, his nose pressed to John’s shoulder. He didn’t smell right - something about being earth-side…

“…I’m sorry…“

It was the third time he had voiced those words but the first time that his voice had faltered, desperate for absolution. Rodney felt his throat tighten as he blinked, silent tears sliding down his cheeks and onto John’s black BDUs.

…Jeannie…

…John…

He breathed in again, trying to distract himself with the missing scent. Rodney didn’t know how to handle it, this omission that said love more than he’d ever experienced before, more than he thought small words could. He felt frustration bubble up inside of himself - leave it to John Sheppard to one-up Han Solo.

“I know…,” Rodney whispered with the faint hint of a smirk, running his hand up John’s back to rest on the nape of his neck. John’s chest shook with a small chuckle and Rodney was suddenly reminded of what he was living for.

“I’ll find another way,” John repeated. Rodney nodded, not able to verbally acknowledged him. He turned his head slightly into John’s neck and took in another breath, a piece falling into place.

“You don’t smell like Atlantis anymore,” he said quietly. “The copper smell from the ancient tech…”

“Neither do you.”

…

“We’ve been here too long.”

“Yeah.”

Reluctantly, they let go.

[ ](https://randommindtime.smugmug.com/Fan-Art/i-CJfrV7q/A)

Come follow me on Tumblr! [www.randommindtime.tumblr.com](http://www.randommindtime.tumblr.com)


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